IT'S GIVE-AWAY TIME!

okay, okay, i'm out of the habit of blogging when work goes cuckoo on me and i decide to take a cycle or two off of trying. but, even though i'm benched for the next few week, it does not mean i'm pouring back the vino and ignoring my old body.

nope, still doing my supplements, and today, i'm going to share with you one of my favorites i've found along this wacky journey: FertileCM.

yup, i'd seen all the stuff all over the blogosphere on FertilAid and FertileCM, but didn't pay too much attention because i figured, oh, i'm doing fine with my supplements. as i head into clomid cycles. with a 40 year old body.

and i wondered why i was having problems charting my CM as directed. i mean, where was this elusive stuff? i knew clomid was drying and all, but really?

then on my third round of clomid, i gave in and ordered some FerileCM, since the old "drink lots of pineapple juice and take evening primrose oil" had done nothing for me. it arrived on CD6, i started taking it, and in less than a week -- while taking clomid -- i had a light bulb moment. THAT was CM! and pretty soon it became omg, EWCM!

love this stuff -- it can wake up even a 40 year cervix and teach it how to do its job.

so, if you would like to try some, just leave comment to this post by October 30. i'll be doing a random drawing from all comments on Saturday, October 31st - how's that for a trick or treat? trust me, it's a treat. ;)

in the meantime, if you want to check out Fairhaven Health and their other products (i'll be posting reviews and giveaways on them in the next couple of weeks), i have a special coupon code for you. just enter "GREATDEAL" at checkout and get 10% off your entire order before December 31.

Houston, we have a problem

my head is sore from banging it on my desk.

yesterday morning, i had a mild heart attack as my BBT jumped from a 97.6 to 98.2 -- nicely over my coverline. except that we were on CD6. i nervously figured maybe my allergies were bothering me, or i was sick. still, in talking to the bank yesterday with the when to ship question, i asked the all important, what happens if i have an anovulatory cycle? they said shipping back was not problem, so i felt better.

until this morning when my BBT registered at 98.4.

for those who like to play along at home, let's look at this cycles temps so far:

97.7 / 97.8 / 97.3 (nice, looking good here) / 97.3 / 97.6 / 98.2 / 98.4

it doesn't look like an anovulatory cycle with the ping-pong ball bouncing all the hell over the place. instead it looks like a nice strong ovulation. a week early.

WTF?

i should probably add to the discussion that this past menstruation was the most pathetic excuse for a period ever. TMI warning: 2 days light brown spotting. again with the WTF. i had a chemical pregnancy. shouldn't i at least get a decent flow? never mind the fact i haven't had a red, strong period since beginning this craziness back in March.

(and yes, before you ask, i did another HPT this morning just in case and because i'm on all these not-while-preggers supplements. BFN, so it's not that.)

i'm blaming clomid. it's the only thing i can figure out. i went from lovely normal, regular cycles to pathetic, limp ones. i know it can completely dry you out and thin the uterine lining, so that has to be what happened. my previous "break" month back in May was a bit scattered and not that great. besides, i get to blame the clomid for the raging back acne which is only now finally starting to subside.

which means, i think i'm calling the bank again in a couple hours and telling them that we are having to scrub this month. i had been thinking i should give my body a month break after the clomid to get a "normal" cycle back under its feet. i think my temps are just confirming what was in the back of my head, and i need to slow down with the omg it's now or never! i must get pregnant! rush.

but if anyone has some insight or theories or can reassure me things can get back to normal and that the 4 cycles of clomid didn't blow out the last remaining eggs i had, i would really love some feedback.

i keep grasping at the small positives: my skin is amazing right now (hasn't been like this since i was a teen -- yeah i had gorgeous skin as a teenager), my hair and nails are growing like weeds, my body feel wonderful, and my boobs are up another cup size. i'm not sure if the last one is a positive or not, since i'm kind of at a loss with what to do with them, but i figure its a sign that somewhere, some hormone is happy and making my body at least look all fertile.

in the meantime, focusing on my yoga breathing and doing a heck of a lot of forward bends today to combat the stress of this all.

welcome to the challenge

the past couple days i've had a hint of the flu sneaking up on me to try and attack. i'm chalking this up to the fact that as a good little trying to become pregnant patient, i stopped taking my Wellness Formula supplement that is chock full of six million herbs and other stuff and has that big old warning of talk to your doctor if you are crazy enough to try and get pregnant, are pregnant or nursing. i hold full faith that those suckers are the reason i have not had a cold in the decade i've been taking them -- best things ever. so after leaving work yesterday feeling like i had been run over by a truck that then decided to park on my chest, i took a handful, crawled into bed and slept myself out.

but i did set an alarm to remind me to take my clomid for the first day of the challenge. expecting the worst of the side effects, i decided an evening take time would make more sense -- try and sleep off most of the effects. the result is ... not much. no violent mood swings (except i'm cheerful this morning -- what's up with that?), no dizziness since i was already dizzy with flu attack at the time i took it, and no nausea, since again, had already been present.

i did leave a message with the GP regarding the cymbalta question, and he's out of town at a conference, but the nurse said he'd call monday night. i did a ton more research and reading, and i have to say, i'm leaning towards asking to stay on, maybe at a reduced dose. i'm already on a low dose, but in all honesty, i think the benefits far outweigh the risks, especially as there is nothing to clearly prove that some of the risks are connected to the cymbalta. we'll see what he says, and i'll raise it with the RE again and get her take (and then later, the OB/midwife's take on it).

also started the pack of OPKs i picked up as the RE suggested. though why when i'm on a clomid challenge is beyond me. but at 5 am, i think the reason became clear -- it take a certain amount of skill and being awake to pee on a stick. this is obviously something to get me in practice for the coming months. . . .